Sam Lutfi Remembers When Britney Spears And Her Matted Weave Used To Buy Him Any Lighter He Wanted

Wow, weave #34. That was some genuine horsehair. Here's a snap of Sam Lutfi back in the good ole' days when he was drugging Britney Spears and using her money to buy any sort of item at the gas station he wanted. It was all Slim Jims, Blow-Pops, Durex condoms, Seventeen magazine and those fake roses that when you open them are actually panties. No, they seriously make those. I've seen them. Panty roses! Sam Lutfi says he's "cooperating" with Britney's family's efforts to keep his ass away from her.

Lawyers for Lutfi and Brit's family met in court, as the judge extended the restraining order against him until July 31. He has been ordered by the courts to stay away from her since February.

"Sam and the family are communicating and cooperating trying to do what's best for Britney," Lutfi's spokesman, Michael Sands, said.

Britney's Mom Lynne Spears has accused Sam of giving her daughter Risperdal, a sleeping medication, and Seroquel, an anti-psychotic drug. Lutfi has admitted that he did give Britney a handful of sleeping pills, but says that she was down with it.

Sam's probably been eating Ramen and not being able to afford male escorts since February and he's looking forward to July when he can try and get his meal ticket back.

More photos of Britney Spears leaving Bally's

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Heather Mills' Boobs Aren't Getting Along

Heather Mills' cleavage is experiencing its own personal Chernobyl. If you know your titties are wonky, don't uncover em'. Here she is at the Miss USA pageant. Heather was a judge, and experienced some negative reactions to her appearance.

The event was held at the Planet Hollywood Hotel & Casino in Vegas, and when Heather was introduced, the crowd booed and jeered. People aren't impressed that she just grifted Sir Paul McCartney out of almost 50 million dollars.

"I really enjoyed myself. It was a great contest. If there was some negative reaction, what can you do? There will always be some people like that," she said in response the heckling.

They were probably just trying to tell her that one of breasts was trying to escape her body.

More photos of Heather Mills and Joey Fatone at the Miss USA competition

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Britney Spears Crashed Her Car Because She Was Trying To Put On Her Face

Photos: WENN socialitelife.com

Britney Spears might have crashed her car on the freeway on Saturday night because she was applying make-up. This does not surprise me in the least. It's a bad move, but I'm not going to fault her because I've seen so many American women doing this very same thing. And some drag queens.

The owner of the car she rear-ended at 10-15 mph says that he had been admiring Britney in her white Mercedes as she applied her face regimen. He didn't realize it was Britney Spears until she tried to enter his car through the backseat. Admiring? Glaucoma!

Britney's bodyguard reportedly apologized, but Britney merely mentioned that she was on the way to meet her Mom for dinner. Someone should have gotten delivery.

Britney's dad Jamie Spears reportedly has control over her driving, and sets limits on when and where she can take the car. He must have been watching a fishing show when she escaped.

Seriously, I'm not going to bag on her. I've seen people reading paperbacks, flat-ironing hair, conference calling, and changing clothes on the highway. Who am I kidding? The morning commute was the time to check for stray nose hairs, zits, possible bats in the cave (boogers) and to have a cell phone argument with your brother over the Vicodin he stole from Ri-Ri Harvey's medicine cabinet. We were arguing because he didn't share it. Life doesn't stop because you're behind the wheel. It probably should, but this is America. We're in a hurry and we need to multi-task.